Men at most differ as Heaven and Earth, but women, worst and best, as Heaven and Hell. ~Alfred Lord Tennyson
The average dog is a nicer person than the average person. ~Andy Rooney
The magnificence of mountains, the serenity of nature - nothing is safe from the idiot marks of man's passing. ~Loudon Wainwright
There are two kinds of people: those who say to God, "Thy will be done," and those to whom God says, "All right, then, have it your way." ~C.S. Lewis, The Screwtape Letters, 1943
Men want the same thing from their underwear that they want from women: a little bit of support, and a little bit of freedom. ~Jerry Seinfeld
No one could give her such soothing and sensible consolation as this little three-month-old creature when he lay at her breast and she felt the movement of his lips and the snuffling of his tiny nose. ~Leo Tolstoy
I could eat alphabet soup and shit better lyrics. ~Johnny Mercer, on a British musical
There is a certain age at which a child looks at you in all earnestness and delivers a long, pleased speech in all the true inflections of spoken English, but with not one recognizable syllable. There is no way you can tell the child that if language had been a melody, he had mastered it and done well, but that since it was in fact a sense, he had botched it utterly. ~Annie Dillard, Pilgrim at Tinker Creek
Dancing is wonderful training for girls, it's the first way you learn to guess what a man is going to do before he does it. ~Christopher Morley, Kitty Foyle
A dying man needs to die, as a sleepy man needs to sleep, and there comes a time when it is wrong, as well as useless, to resist. ~Stewart Alsop
A look at the past reminds us of how great is the distance, and how short, over which we have come. The past makes us ask what we have done with us. It makes us ask whether our very achievements are not ironical counterpoint and contrast to our fundamental failures. ~Robert Penn Warren
The tree which moves some to tears of joy is in the eyes of others only a green thing which stands in their way. ~William Blake
The sky is the daily bread of the eyes. ~Ralph Waldo Emerson
Poetry is perfect verbs hunting for elusive nouns. ~J. Patrick Lewis, www.jpatricklewis.com
I would thank you from the bottom of my heart, but for you my heart has no bottom. ~Author Unknown
Source: a firsthand document or primary reference work.
Things are only impossible until they're not. ~Star Trek: The Next Generation, Jean-Luc Picard
Give your stress wings and let it fly away. ~Terri Guillemets
The time to begin writing an article is when you have finished it to your satisfaction. By that time you begin to clearly and logically perceive what it is you really want to say. ~Mark Twain
Rivers are roads which move, and which carry us whither we desire to go. ~Blaise Pascal
When a man sends you an impudent letter, sit right down and give it back to him with interest ten times compounded, and then throw both letters in the wastebasket. ~Elbert Hubbard
A "Normal" person is the sort of person that might be designed by a committee. You know, "Each person puts in a pretty color and it comes out gray." ~Alan Sherman
If a man does not make new acquaintances as he advances through life, he will soon find himself alone. A man should keep his friendships in constant repair. ~Samuel Johnson
Canst thou bind, the sweet influences of Pleiades, or loose the bands of Orion? ~Job 38:31